Once Again

My life has a tendency to be cyclical in nature. In other words, I always seem to come around to the same places. The most frustrating thing about this never ending cycle is that each time I arrive at the same place I’ve already been I realize that the lessons I thought I learned the previous time around, I in fact hadn’t learned at all.

Tapestry (the church I’m planting in Belltown) is doing great. We’ve set everything up correctly and done a ton of work to ensure that we have the foundation necessary to be a long-term ministry and not another flash in the pan. We’ve successfully completed the first phase of our plan on time and we’re now merging into phase two. However phase two is were churches either take off, or die.

I’ve been here before. I tremble at the thought of phase two, because phase two requires FAITH!!! Once again I find myself in the position of realizing that up to this point everything that has been done for this project, has been directed by me. In other words it was the busy work of setting up the website (www.tapestrybelltown.com), setting up the board of directors, writing up the bylaws and constitution, creating a phased model etc. I always had something to do, something that could occupy my time and feed my need for hope in the vision of Tapestry. I didn’t need God help.

Today phase two looms on the horizon and I realize there is nothing I can do. The busy work is done. I stand with my hands in my pockets wondering if it’s going to hold together. Wondering if the time I neglected to spend with God will bite me in the ass. Wondering if God plans to get onboard with my plan (ouch). Have I heard Gods voice, or have I been acting on my own volition? Only time will tell. From this point on I have to volunteer control and spend a lot of time on my knees.

The cycle has once again been completed, and once again I see how many thing I took into my own hands. When will I learn?